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[bloodandblunder]

"H... hello? Um, this is me-- ah, Noire! I'm Noire, and I'm very sorry for missing you somehow... I promise I'm not avoiding you, unless you're scary or you're Mo-- trying to curse me. U-um, so when I can figure out how to-- ( beeps ensue, followed by a shriek of fright ) O-oh, no! What did I push, how do I-- make it-- oh gods, did I break it?! W-why can't we just talk in person?!"

[ BEEP. ]

voicemail; action ; video

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[bloodandblunder]

[ she shakes her head, breathing hard, but all of that anger is draining out of her as she takes a step back. Because it's hitting her, as hard as this hit him. ]

Don't ask me that like it's so easy to explain...

[willbreak]

Noire, you're so— why...

[ SORRY ASKING AGAIN. ]

[bloodandblunder]

[ EUGEO DIDN'T SHE JUST ASK YOU NOT TO ASK ]

I... told you-- [ and her voice is too shaky now. ] I told you I-I was giving up, so-- please don't...

[willbreak]

Don't what?

[ It's gentle. Maybe he won't upset her even more that way. ]

[bloodandblunder]

[ Don't hate me. Don't ask me why. Don't give me false hope.

There's so much to say, and when she tries to say it, it's all so dry and crumbly in her throat, nothing emerging except some faintly distressed gasping sound. There's fear squeezing her chest, and it's not unlike the terror when she'd seen him jump, except that the feeling keeps getting tighter and tighter.

Why hadn't she stopped herself in time? ]

[willbreak]

... You can't. I'm someone with no place in society.

[bloodandblunder]

[ ... of all the things to say, that he could have said, saying that he didn't feel that way about her, that there was someone else he cared about, anything beyond social status--

There are words now, as strong as the urge to run away. That feeling in her chest is close to agonizing now. ]

Only some people in the Shepherds are nobles or knights. Some of them came from villages or farms. My mother defected from her own country. I was a guinea pig for every curse imaginable and I'm still no one special, so why would you even think something like that would matter to me?

It's fine if you reject me, but don't tell me I can't feel one way or another because of a reason like that...

[willbreak]

[ HAHAHA social status.

He shakes his head, smiling slightly. ]

I didn't mean it like that. In my world, there's the «Human World» and the «Dark Territory». Think of it as Haven West and the subway tunnels.

My fate in that world is either to be executed, or to willingly go to the Dark Territory.

[ Or get laid and become Knight of One. ]

[bloodandblunder]

[ well obviously the choice is clear, you stud. ]

... Is that why you didn't want to go back? [ and why is still the dominant question here, because he's too kind a person to end up with a fate like that. ]

[willbreak]

Mm... but that was just selfishness. If I stay here, I can still cause trouble for others even if I decide to live in the tunnels... but that's not the case back home.

I'm fine with going back.

[ ... ]

But being viewed as «more than a friend» by anybody, especially you, just feels... wrong.

[bloodandblunder]

[ especially her...

Noire had known as much, had resolved to give up precisely because she'd known she couldn't possibly--

But it still hurts, and she presses her palm to her chest with something like a wince. ]

I'm sorry... in the end, feeling like this-- I really did hurt you, didn't I?

[willbreak]

That's not—

[ THE POINT HE WAS TRYING TO MAKE DAMMIT. ]

You've never hurt me... but I just end up hurting you over and over again...

How can you like someone like that?

[bloodandblunder]

That's because you're Eugeo. You push yourself too much and you're always looking out for everyone else and you told me once that I always tried to help you, when it was the opposite-- it was always you helping me, and you never truly hurt--

[ breathe, Noire. ]

You're more than you think you are-- so how could I not like you?? You can call that wrong, but that's how I feel... no matter what you say your fate is.

[willbreak]

[ For once, he doesn't flinch at her... upset shrieking.

He has to be firm about this. ]

I'm less than human, Noire.

[bloodandblunder]

[ and in perhaps what is the most succinct thing she's said all day-- ]

I don't care.

[willbreak]

[ Does he really have to— ]

Well, I do.

I'm sorry.

[ Even though having someone accept him like this is what he wants most in the world. ]

[bloodandblunder]

I told you before... [ she's tired now, so worn out from what could only be described as emotional whiplash. ]

No matter what, I want to stay with you. No matter what you are, no matter what you've done.

... I know that's selfish. So right now... I-I'll go and try to remember how to be a friend again. I think I've put you through a lot, and I'm sorry for that.

[ but now that it's been said, she won't take it back. ]

[willbreak]

You... [ are still misunderstanding completely ]

... should rest.

[ Eugeo says the wrong thing, take 500. ]

[bloodandblunder]

[ nothing would even change.

But she doesn't even bother to reply to that, giving him one last glance before she resettles her bow and trudges off to go curl in a corner for the next three days or so. ]